Contrary to what I have been doing for the past few years, which is sending out personal messages to people who are dear to me, I will do a different year-ender this time. While others are looking back, this year, mine will be about what lies ahead of me. My 2010 basically sucks so there’s nothing really to look back into so might as well look forward, right?
So just a thought, how do you define 'possibility' and 'opportunity'? Do they differ in meaning or somewhat synonymous? How can one say that he/she is 'opening up' or just 'settling'?
Generally, I believe that how one defines these words is a case-to-case basis, depending on how one views his/her current situation and how one views a certain something as possibility or an opportunity. As for my case, here's how I define it:
Possibility versus opportunity. They seem similar in meaning, both of them refers to 'chance', makes you want to 'try' and has no guarantee if you'll be successful or not; but there is a fine line of difference. Possibility presents a chance, a future prospect, somewhat very vague. Opportunity is a given lucky chance, somewhat handed to you by fate that is mostly in favor of you.
Opening up versus settling. Opening up is widening your choices that MAY OR MAY NOT be even in your league and exploring them altogether or one at a time. Settling is like being stuck and with no other choices left in front of you.
But the bottomline here is whenever you open yourself up or whenever you settle to either a possibility or an opportunity, still you risk yourself by doing it or engaging in it because you don’t know what’s gonna happen next, you don't know what to expect, you don’t know if you’ll gonna like or want it until the end or if you can outlast it.
So for this coming year, I am going to combine these four words based on how I define them to create my mantra: OPEN UP TO A POSSIBILITY AND NEVER SETTLE EASILY FOR AN OPPORTUNITY. (Easier said than done.) Okay, don't get me wrong here. I do appreciate when opportunities present itself to me. Most of the time, I have grabbed opportunities in front of me. That's how safe in life I am. I have always lived my life mainly on the comfort zone, on planning every step of the way and doing something unsure scares the hell out of me. It's a scary world out there and opting to go for something I had never tried before and more uncertain than a job I'm supposed to have is like choosing between life and death (Okay, that may be a little, little exaggerated but you get my point. Haha). I'm tired of playing safe, of being too practical all the time and I just want to move out of my box. I am going to be open to each possibility and every opportunity BUT I am not going to settle right away if I think that it is less than I deserve and if it's not going to make me ENTIRELY happy at all. Despite the uncertainties and for whatever reason or magical force from above, there are more things that make me want to try and do them badly. And the heck with what happens next. To choose not to do them would just kill me and it would be the biggest mistake of my life. So I am going to focus on those. While I still have the time and luxury to try things and no contract is tying me down. :)
My 2010 is a year of trial-and-error, if you may call it. I tried granting what my parents want from me. But I wasn't able to give them that. I failed myself and I failed them at the same time. Not on purpose, of course. When I come to think of it, maybe it’s not the right time or it’s not what or where God wants me to be. Or probably it’s really not for me and it's God's way of speaking to me that I should stop chasing for that lost opportunity and just go after the possibility that I had been considering. I don’t know. Who knows anyway?
In between volunteering for a hospital and bumming around, I’d found a part of me that is envious of my peers and batchmates who were already a step ahead of me in their careers and a part of me that is thankful because I still got the time in my hands to really think.
Do I really want this badly that I'm wasting much time waiting for that job? No.
After I get that job, will I be really, really, really happy? No.
Should I just jump right ahead into that professional path though I feel unsure if it's right for me? No.
Why would I be unsure in the first place? Yeah, why would I? Why would I question myself that in the first place.
When I do get that job, what would be my reason behind in doing it? Is it because I want it and I love doing the task that entails it or is it just for the sake of doing the ‘automatic’, the ‘given next step’? No comment. Go figure.
Should I just give up waiting for something I am not entirely sure if I want it and just go for something that I really want to do? Do I still have to verbally say it, I mean really?
Honestly, I'm frustrated, annoyed and bored. But then, when I imagine myself in the shoes of my colleagues, I still find myself smiling and thinking, "I'm still luckier because I don't have to put up with that." So yeah, probably and definitely I don’t want it after all. People give up things they just don’t want. Simple as that. This is the time wherein I should stop blaming the economy and myself for not realizing early on what I really want and just make a move for the other things that I WANT so as not to waste any more time and experience what is out of my comfort zone. It should and must come to an end now. I had already set aside things that I had wanted to do for my parents, for the so-called 'I-thought-this-was-what-I-wanted career" which is obviously still non-existent, there’s no backing down this time. I will kill anyone who will mess with my 2011. *insert evil smirk and laugh*
And you would think I would enumerate here my main To-do List for this coming year. But no, I would have to keep it a secret though. Let me just surprise you with the upcoming stories I'm gonna share with you through my posts. :) Let's just all sit tight, relax and wait for the unexpected while enjoying the ride. :)
And no resolutions for this year also. Resolutions are good but I believe it's better to be (or at least try to be) a better person each living day. It generally stands up for at least almost, if not all, of our resolutions. Well, that's for me who never accomplishes all of my resolutions and using that thought as an excuse. Haha! I know, I am such a fail! Hahaha! But I had a point, right? Right? :p
Let’s all look forward for a fruitful and better year ahead of us! Let's all be more awesome and improved! :D Advance Happy New Year! :)
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| Happy New Year! :D |
I know 2011 will be my year. I'll say it again, REMEMBER MY NAME BECAUSE IT'S GONNA BE ALL OVER THE PLACE. Yes, I meant what I said back in high school and still mean that.
(I actually didn't know exactly what I was talking about or referring to during that one English class. If I'm not mistaken, I was thinking of myself as a model. WTH, i know. A girl can dream, what can I say? But now I know I wasn't totally referring to that! :D)